Heimweh - Thoughts on Homesickness and my Previous Hatred towards Boise ID

So my homesickness finally arrived. Of course I was expecting it... I guess it just took me off guard. Swept me off my feet this morning in a very nonromantic way.
Homesickness has been a tricky friend of mine since I first started spending the night at my grandparents and grandmas house. You know what I mean right? You go to your grandparents house, its freaking awesome, you eat a bunch of sweets and watch movies that maybe you shouldn't be watching and its like the best time of your life! But then you're lying there on your grandmothers couch a few minutes after she tucks you in and you feel a hole in your heart. Like, oh geez, what if I need my mom tonight? What if I need my dad? What if they need me? It sinks in and the voices won't stop tugging at you until you burst into tears and end up calling your parents to rescue you from such terror. I had this happen so many times as a child. And in my teenage years when it wasn't cool to call your parents at sleepovers... The homesickness ate at me all the time. All I wanted was my bed, my dogs, and the security that I was there for my family at any moment of the night.
Moving to Germany was me facing homesickness, flipping it off, and moving on with my life. Or so I wanted it to be... But I remember those first six months clearly. They were full of tears, holes in my heart, and doubt. Was moving to another country for a year the right thing to do? I should've just stayed at home...
After six months, I found that the Kless's house felt like home to me, and while the Heimweh for Boise bugged me, it was overshadowed by how comfortable I was here. And when I left the Kless's to go back to Boise, it was another rough six months of having homesickness for Germany...
I don't think I'll ever live my life without homesickness. I was so homesick for Germany and when I got here, it was bliss. It was like waking up from a coma. Now that a month and one week has gone by, I feel the reality of leaving Boise.
While I never plan on living in Boise again, I will always miss it. I'll miss the mountains and the river, the Co-op stealing my money from me, the exciting moments when the Record Exchange had that one piece of music you were looking for... I'll miss the Hyde Park Street Fair, the time of year when the hot air ballons show up and you think to yourself "damn its that time of year already?". I'll miss midnight drives up to Bogus, the ability to get out of town and barely make it home on a half tank of gas... I'll miss walking past Boise High while on a guilt trip work out sesh at the YMCA.
Home sickness it not just about missing your house and your family... its about missing a community. While Boise simply was not the place for me to start my adult life, I will always love and respect it as a city that it simply gorgeous and full of life.